Friday, May 30, 2008

Jerry West's Odd Appearance After Lakers' Win Conference

In the immediate aftermath of the Lakers' series-clinching victory, Laker great Jerry West got on the mic to spread Christmas joy and regale Kobe with compliments (as pictured to the right). Again, West is a Laker great. He was the architect of the last 200 Lakers teams which made it to the Finals. He looks unequivocally comfortable amid all that Forum blue and gold. His presence at center court in-and-of-itself is worth only a glance.

But considering his consultant role in Memphis, following several years running the Grizzly show, and considering a significant reason the Lakers have gotten to the Finals is named Pau Gasol, and considering the Lakers acquired Gasol in a deal which was universally considered heavily lopsided, to the point in which executives from several NBA teams reacted by openly saying there should be a committee of team execs which is allowed, fantasy-style, to veto such lopsided trades, and considering that last summer Kobe made an ultimatum which consisted of "bring back Jerry West or trade me," and considering West has a history of seriously not giving a flip about what anyone thinks about anything he does ever, and considering once again that West is for all intents and porpoises a lifelong Laker ... should we be concerned with him showing up on TNT before Marv's brow even dries?

West has been connected deeply to the Lakers franchise since 1960. I'm not saying he locked Chris Wallace and Michael Heisley in a cell and forced them to trade Gasol for a highly questionable package of ifs, ands, and maybes. But as a trusted consultant (and one of the top basketball minds in the world), he could have been in their ears, arguing the overblown "flexibility" perspective and talking up Javaris Crittenton as the next coming of Wade as simple ruse to get his real loyalties the steal of the decade.

Back in February, West denied involvement. But we wouldn't be talking about any of this if West wasn't on TV ten seconds after the final whistle. (And, of course, it's unlikely West gives a giggle that we are talking about it.)

Homeless Japanese Woman Caught Living In Man's Closet

TOKYO - A homeless woman who sneaked into a man's house and lived undetected in his closet for a year was arrested in Japan after he became suspicious when food mysteriously began disappearing.
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Police found the 58-year-old woman Thursday hiding in the top compartment of the man's closet and arrested her for trespassing, police spokesman Hiroki Itakura from southern Kasuya town said Friday.

The resident of the home installed security cameras that transmitted images to his mobile phone after becoming puzzled by food disappearing from his kitchen over the past several months.

One of the cameras captured someone moving inside his home Thursday after he had left, and he called police believing it was a burglar. However, when they arrived they found the door locked and all windows closed.

"We searched the house ... checking everywhere someone could possibly hide," Itakura said. "When we slid open the shelf closet, there she was, nervously curled up on her side."

The woman told police she had no place to live and first sneaked into the man's house about a year ago when he left it unlocked.

She had moved a mattress into the small closet space and even took showers, Itakura said, calling the woman "neat and clean."

GS Warriors dancing

Monta Ellis secret

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Isolated Tribe Spotted in Brazil

Here is the original article with pics.

One of South America's few remaining uncontacted indigenous tribes has been spotted and photographed on the border between Brazil and Peru.

The Brazilian government says it took the images to prove the tribe exists and help protect its land.

The pictures, taken from an aeroplane, show red-painted tribe members brandishing bows and arrows.

More than half the world's 100 uncontacted tribes live in Brazil or Peru, Survival International says.

Stephen Corry, the director of the group - which supports tribal people around the world - said such tribes would "soon be made extinct" if their land was not protected.

'Monumental crime'

Survival International said that although this particular group is increasing in number, others in the area are at risk from illegal logging.


Uncontacted tribe near Brazil-Peru border

In pictures: Brazil tribe

The photos were taken during several flights over one of the most remote parts of the Amazon rainforest in Brazil's Acre region.

They show tribe members outside thatched huts, surrounded by the dense jungle, pointing bows and arrows up at the camera.

"We did the overflight to show their houses, to show they are there, to show they exist," the group quoted Jose Carlos dos Reis Meirelles Junior, an official in the Brazilian government's Indian affairs department, as saying.

"This is very important because there are some who doubt their existence."

He described the threats to such tribes and their land as "a monumental crime against the natural world" and "further testimony to the complete irrationality with which we, the 'civilised' ones, treat the world".

Disease is also a risk, as members of tribal groups that have been contacted in the past have died of illnesses that they have no defence against, ranging from chicken pox to the common cold.

Bill Murray's Wife Files for Divorce

CHARLESTON, S.C. - The wife of entertainer Bill Murray has filed for divorce after nearly 11 years of marriage, alleging he abused her and is addicted to marijuana and alcohol.

Jennifer Butler Murray filed divorce papers May 12 in Charleston County. She owns a home on Sullivans Island, S.C., where she lives with the couple's four children.

The complaint was first reported by The Post and Courier of Charleston. It also alleges frequent abandonment by the former "Saturday Night Live" star.

Bill Murray's attorney, John McDougall, wouldn't comment on the allegations, but said the entertainer "is deeply saddened by the breakup of his marriage."

"He and his wife made loving parents and they are committed to the best interests of their children," McDougall said.

Jennifer Murray's attorney, Robert Rosen, said he had no comment.

The couple signed a prenuptial agreement, which was filed as an exhibit with the divorce papers, before they married in 1997. As part of the agreement, both waived their right to alimony or support if the marriage broke up. However, Murray agreed to pay $7 million to his ex-wife within 60 days of a final divorce decree.

The complaint, which doesn't specify instances of Murray's alleged marijuana or alcohol use, alleges he would often leave without telling his wife and says he "travels overseas where he engages in public and private altercations and sexual liaisons."

It also alleges Murray physically abused his wife and last November "hit her in the face and then told her she was `lucky he didn't kill her.'"

The documents obtained by The Post and Courier were sealed by the court last week.

Murray, the star of movies such as "Ghostbusters," "Caddyshack" and "Groundhog Day," is a co-owner of the Charleston RiverDogs minor league baseball team.

The 57-year-old actor earned an Oscar nomination for his role in "Lost in Translation."

Sarah Long on American Idol

Man and I thought she was hot in high school too. Shame.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Jose Canseco Finds A Boxing Competitor

Jose Canseco, because things are going so well for him these days, has been looking for someone to go toe-to-toe with him in a celebrity (and I use that term very, very loosely) boxing match. He had recently been offering $5,000 to get someone to accept the challenge, and for a while, everyone, as they usually do, completely ignored Jose Canseco.

But a brave hero has finally stepped up so that this stupid fight may finally take place. And that hero is former Philadelphia Eagles return man Vai Sikahema. What a relief that must be for the millions of you who sit around all day and wistfully think, "Man, when is Jose Canseco going to fight Vai Sikahema?!"

Canseco claims that he's earned black belts in Kung fu, Taekwondo, and Muay Thai. I'd love to doubt him (and I sort of do), but the man does have a certain track record for telling the truth. He's also going to have a considerable height and weight advantage over Sikahema.

As for Sikahema's qualifcations, he grew up wanting to be a professional boxer, and he fought in a National Golden Gloves Championship that would eventually be won by a fellow named Sugar Ray Leonard. That explains the goal-post punching celebration you see above (they do look like quality punches).

More recently, he's been staying in shape by anchoring at NBC-10 in Philadelphia and going shopping with Johnny Weir. I hear that's Floyd Mayweather's secret, too.

The fight is scheduled for July 12th in Atlantic City. I will consider watching it if the promoters call me and offer me $49.95 to do so.

Vince Young Says He Nearly Quit Football After 1 Year

For the first time this year, the people at EA Sports elected to put a retired player on the cover of their Madden video game. Unbeknownst to them, they almost did the same thing last year. Vince Young was ready to quit football after his rookie year.

He doesn't go into great detail about the reasons, but he did tell Thomas George of NFL.com that things were once so bad for him that retirement was a viable option.

"I really thought long and hard about it. There was so much going on with my family. It was crazy being an NFL quarterback. It wasn't fun anymore. All of the fun was out of it. All of the excitement was gone. All I was doing was worrying about things.

If nothing else, it's a reminder that we never, ever really know what's going on with our favorite athletes. Or anyone, really. Being rich, being famous, being idolized, being on the cover of Madden ... none of it guarantees that a guy won't be sitting at home crying his eyes out and listening to, I don't know, Elliott Smith albums or something.

If he even considered walking away from life in the NFL, whatever pain or frustration he was experiencing had to be pretty profound. It's probably Merril Hoge's fault.

Young's feeling better about things now, though.

"My teammates helped lift me out of it. I prayed really hard. And I began to focus on God's calling for me. Play football. Be a role model."

That's good to hear. And I suppose this post wouldn't be complete without mention of these pictures that made the rounds recently. I never paid them much attention here, because I didn't think they were that big of a deal. He's sweaty, he's shirtless, he's drinking. He's allowed. More than half of the posts I'll make today will be in the same condition.

It's odd to think, though, that if the same pictured had surfaced a year ago, and they got the same attention, it might have been the thing that pushed Vince Young into an extremely early retirement.

World Handshaking Record Broken

SAN FRANCISCO - Kevin Whittaker and Cory Jens deserved a hand after their record-setting attempt, but they probably didn't want to shake it. The pair sought to set a new world record Monday by shaking hands with one another for 9 1/2 hours, apparently beating the previous record set by two Germans by a half-hour.
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The Guinness Book of World Records still must confirm the feat, one that Whittaker, 31, and Jens, 30, felt pretty confident in achieving.

"I looked up what some of the weakest records were," Whittaker said. "I'm not going to break the 100-meter dash record, but I thought I could break this record."

The rules from Guinness appeared easy enough: Handshakers are not required to look each other in the eye or exchange pleasantries; they simply must grip palms and continuously move their hands up and down.

The historic day began at 2:07 p.m. outside the Ferry Building, where the duo endured the discomfort of such issues as sweaty palms, arm cramps and, of course, bathroom breaks. By nightfall, the two decided to continue their quest for greatness at a hotel bar, where they found warmth, comfortable seats and alcoholic beverages.

The effort culminated at 11:38 p.m. with a bottle of bubbly — and some much-needed space.

"It's not that fun, believe me," Whittaker said. "I'm a little tired. My shoulder is tired. In fact, it's extremely painful."

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Minor League Player Traded For Baseball Bats

This story is rather unusual.

McALLEN, Texas (AP) -- During three years in the low minors, John Odom never really made a name for himself.

That sure changed this week -- he's the guy who was traded for a bunch of bats.

"I don't really care," he said Friday. "It'll make a better story if I make it to the big leagues."

For now, Odom is headed to the Laredo Broncos of the United League. They got him Tuesday from the Calgary Vipers of the Golden Baseball League for a most unlikely price: 10 Prairie Sticks Maple Bats, double-dipped black, 34-inch, C243 style.

"They just wanted some bats, good bats -- maple bats," Broncos general manager Jose Melendez said.

According to the Prairie Sticks Web site, their maple bats retail for $69 each, discounted to $65.50 for purchases of six to 11 bats.

"It will be interesting to see what 10 bats gets us," Melendez said.

The Canadian team signed Odom about a month ago, but couldn't get the 26-year-old righty into the country. It seems Odom had a "minor" but unspecified criminal record that wasn't revealed to immigration officials before they scanned his passport, Vipers president Peter Young said.

Odom said the charge stemmed from a fight he was in at age 17. Although he thought it had been expunged from his record, it popped up during immigration.

Odom spent hundreds of dollars driving to the Canadian border and staying at a Montana hotel while the matter was sorted out. He then drove to Laredo after the trade.

Originally from Atlanta, Odom was drafted late by the San Francisco Giants in 2003. He pitched 38 games, all in Class A, from 2004-06, and was released by the organization this spring.

Laredo intends to activate Odom on Monday and have him make his first start Wednesday.

Odom said he was supposed to be traded for Laredo's best hitter. But when that player balked at moving to Calgary, the bats entered the deal.

Laredo offered cash for Odom, but Young said that was "an insult."

The bat trade wasn't the first time Calgary came up with some creative dealmaking. The Vipers once tried to acquire a pitcher for 1,500 blue seats when they were renovating their stadium, Young said.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Martha Riley Quits Northgate

Shligginit sources have found Principal Martha Riley has put in her letter of resignation as of May 22nd.

Word on the wire services are that she had an apparent affair with another administrator. Which brings back memories of another former administrator, Bud Beemer, who had sexual relations with former employees at College Park and came to Northgate after word of the relations spread throughout the College Park community.

Baseball and Instant Replays

NEW YORK - A top baseball official will formulate a proposal for instant replay, and the technology could be tested in the Arizona Fall League this year.
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Jimmie Lee Solomon, the sport's executive vice president for baseball operations, wouldn't put a timetable on a replay plan, which was recommended by general managers in November. The idea drew renewed attention following several blown home run calls by umpires in recent days.

"The times are such that our fans are used to seeing all the high technology and they're used to seeing the other sports that use these systems to make determinations, and the fans are clamoring for all the sports to look at that," Solomon said Thursday.

Baseball is developing tentative plans to experiment with replay during the Fall League and likely would continue testing, if it's successful, during the 2009 World Baseball Classic, ESPN.com reported Thursday.

Solomon wouldn't go that far.

"We're looking at various places to start looking at instant replay," he said. "We've made no final decision as to where exactly we're going to try it out, do any test runs or anything yet."

GMs voted 25-5 last November to use replays on boundary calls, such as whether possible homers are fair or foul, whether balls clear fences, and whether there's fan interference.

On Sunday night, umpires at Yankee Stadium reversed a correct call and concluded an apparent home run by the Mets' Carlos Delgado was foul. On Monday night, umps in Houston mistakenly ruled a ball off a center-field wall was in play. And on Wednesday night, the Yankees' Alex Rodriguez lost a home run when umpires decided the ball hit the fence — replays showed it glanced off a yellow staircase behind the fence.

Baseball commissioner Bud Selig repeatedly has said he's against replay but also said he is willing to consider it.

"I've had conversations with the commissioner about it and I know he's giving it a lot of thought and consideration and doing a lot of work on it. Commissioner Selig is getting a lot more information and will know the pros and cons," Seattle Mariners president Chuck Armstrong said.

"I think it's certainly something that bares exploring and I look forward to hearing the results," he added. "You have those things that happened this week in Houston or Yankee Stadium and those things just should not happen."

Solomon noted Selig's habit of being deliberate in his decision-making.

"I think that he's going to be very cautious as we move forward," Solomon said. "I'm hoping to have something to the commissioner as soon as I possibly can, and once I do that it will be on him to decide how fast he wants us to try to be looking at rolling something out, and then after that how soon we'll look to be implementing something. So all of these things right now are very, very, very preliminary."

The use of replay in major league games likely would need the approval of the Major League Baseball Players Association and the World Umpires Association.

"You're going to have to talk to all the parties that are involved because everybody will be needed to make the system a success," Solomon said.

The NFL, NBA, NHL, some NCAA sports and major tennis tournaments use replay in some form. International soccer has resisted, although some leagues use it after matches to sort out suspensions for red and yellow cards.

NYU Student Attempts To "Steal Home" At Graduation

Click Here for the full article with pics and videos

May 15, 2008 --

A graduating New York University student was ejected from his commencement at Yankee Stadium yesterday after he was caught trying to steal home.

William Lopez, 21, of Manhasset, LI, was among 6,000 students who sat in the box seats behind home plate and along the first base and third base lines at the first graduation to take place at the House that Ruth Built.

NYU, which held its 176th commencement at the storied stadium because of construction at Washington Square Park, had a strict ground rule.

"The students had been repeatedly advised . . . that they were strictly prohibited from being on the field," said NYU spokesman John Beckman.

About three-quarters of the way through the ceremony, Lopez, wearing his gown and mortarboard, leaped over the right-field fence onto the field.

He sprinted across the outfield behind second base and made it to third, as many in the crowd, which also included 20,000 guests, cheered him on.

Lopez, a Yankee and Met fan, turned for home as stadium security and NYPD cops tackled him just feet from his goal.

"I was trying to make it to home plate," Lopez told The Post after he was issued a summons for trespass. "I wanted to do a head-first dive. I almost made it, only 10 feet to go."

The Tisch School of the Arts grad said cops told him, "You ruined your graduation, and I said, 'Are you kidding me? The crowd was cheering me on.' "

Lopez's father, Bob Lopez, said when he saw the figure running on the field, "My wife asked, 'Could that be William?' I said, 'No. That kid's an athlete."

His son said, "This is the first and last graduation at Yankee Stadium. There's no better stage than this.' "

But Beckman said that "the Yankees were very gracious hosts and we were grateful to be allowed to be there, and it is always disappointing to us when one member of our community thinks there's a special set of rules for him or her."

Ken Griffey Penny Prank

click here for the article and great pic

Ken Griffey pays off his debts with thousands of pennies

By 'Duk

What a great morning to be a blogger. After a great graduation gag at Yankee Stadium and a fantastic Oriole Magic remake comes this outstanding clubhouse prank from none other than the kid they call Junior Griffey

Since he apparently owed Josh Fogg $1,500, Ken Griffey Jr. went about paying him back in the most devious way possible.

Entirely in pennies.

According to the legendary Hal McCoy of the Daily Dayton News, Griffey paid off his debt by having 150,000 pennies — $25 to a box, 60 total cartons — stacked in Fogg's locker like it was a safe deposit box.

Even better, Griffey worked a sponsorship into the whole affair.

From the DDN:

“I’m a man of my word,” said Griffey. “And when you owe a man $1,500, you pay him. And I’d like to thank the lovely people at National City Bank for helping me with this joke. There isn’t a whole lot you can do with pennies. Just think, each box weighs 16 pounds, so the man has 60 bowling balls in his locker.”

There are so many reasons that almost everyone is a fan of Griffey's and you can add the fact he's still having fun as he closes in on 600 homers to that long list. About the only person who might not appreciate this will probably be the guy stuck behind Fogg at Best Buy as the pitcher tries to buy a new flat screen with all those copper Abe Lincolns.

Snoooop Doggggy Doooooggggg

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

A crazy fact I just heard

the war in Iraq costs the United States 4 Million dollars...... every second.

At first I said to the T.V., "That's ridiculous you liberal bitch!" But after a few seconds I thought about it and realized she was correct.

Really puts Barry Zito's "outrageous" contract in perspective. When America spends more money killing people in 30 seconds than we do on 7 great years of Barry Zito Greatness.

So we now have an "Adsense" Account

See that ad on the top right of your screen?

Well that is apart of Google's Adsense program.

The more traffic we get at this site and the more people who click on our ads the better.

The ads "should" get better as it adapts to our page and what we offer on this site.

Keep posting up the goods guys.

Your boy,

Larry

The Red Hot Chili Peppers Taking an "Extended Break"

Red Hot Chili Peppers frontman Anthony Kiedis has confirmed that the band is to take an extended break while they get round to some much needed r'n'r. But don't worry (or, rather, do, if you're a hater) because they will be back.

Speaking to Rolling Stone, Keidis said: "We actually took a very long time to make the 'Stadium Arcadium' record, because we wrote a lot of songs and then got way too married to them and decided we needed it to be a double album, which was a great experience, but it took forever".

Neglecting to mention how long it takes to listen to the last album, he added that the band haven't had any time off since 1999: "We were all emotionally and mentally zapped at the end of that run. Cooler heads prevailed and the discussion at the end of our last tour was, 'Let's not do anything Red Hot Chili Peppers-related for a minimum of one year, and just live and breathe and eat and learn new things".

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

$175 Burger

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Its creators admit it is the ultimate in decadence: a $175 hamburger.

The Wall Street Burger Shoppe just raised its price from $150 to assure its designation as the costliest burger in the city as determined by Pocket Change, an online newsletter about the most expensive things in New York.

"Wall Street has good days and bad days. We wanted to have the everyday burger (for $4) ... and then something special if you really have a good day on Wall Street," said co-owner Heather Tierney.

The burger, created by chef and co-owner Kevin O'Connell, seeks to justify its price with a Kobe beef patty, lots of black truffles, seared foie gras, aged Gruyere cheese, wild mushrooms and flecks of gold leaf on a brioche bun.

The eatery sells 20 or 25 per month in the fine dining room upstairs versus hundreds of $4 burgers each day at the diner counter downstairs, Tierney said.

Pocket Change previously designated the double truffle burger at Daniel Boulud's DB Bistro Moderne as the most expensive at $120, and the Burger Shoppe set out to top that.

Boulud's creation -- available only during black truffle season from December to March -- rose to $150 this past season, so the Burger Shoppe raised its price on Monday to $175.

"Our burger is not about the price," said Georgette Farkas, a Boulud spokeswoman. "If you are making something concerned only about the price, you are off in the wrong direction."

Without truffles, Boulud's burger costs $32. It has a ground sirloin patty stuffed with red wine braised short ribs.

O'Connell said the Burger Shoppe was "finding the ultimate expression of each one of the ingredients."

"The concept was like a mushroom-bacon-Swiss cheese burger, which is my favorite sort of burger," he said.

The burger comes with golden truffle mayonnaise, Belgian-style fries and a mixed greens and tomato salad. O'Connell pairs the dish with many fine wines, a lager or a toasted brown beer, or ginger ale.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Friday, May 16, 2008

Barry Zito Needs More Money

That’s right, Barry Zito needs to get paid. Even more than what he's getting now.

Zito’s fastball has lost a step, his curveball sits on the edge of the table, and he has yet to win a game this season.

Zito is in the need some motivation. What better motivation than cold, hard cash?

The San Francisco Giants are $13 million dollars short of what their $90 million payroll was last year.

The cash is available. The Giants won't be making any big-time moves this season.

That's all coming this offseason.

Zito is currently getting a hair under $3 million for all seven of his losses this year. At his current rate, that could stretch to $1 million a loss.

So why not offer Zito $500,000 for every win from here on out? Then offer another $500,000 to pitch through the seventh inning (he has yet to warmup for the seventh inning this season).

The Giants have an extra $13 million lying around, let’s make use of it. Plus think of the publicity.

Sure, some people would think the Giants are crazy, they spent $126 million on the guy.

But you would most certainly watch.

The Giants' attendance is already down this year. Think about the motivation for the fans to go watch Zito earn his money. Attendance would spike if a player’s bonus salary was on the line.

All the Zito haters would come out to watch him miss out on an extra $1 million.

On the flip side, Zito fans would come to see him, and the Giants' fans come to see him, and the Giants earn a victory. These fans would tell all the haters, “He earned that extra $500,000 today,” and they would actually be pleased with the $500,000 that their ball club spent.

It could turn out to be the worst train wreck you’ve ever seen, or the most masterful plan to get your “star” player back on track.

Let's say he pitches six innings and gets the win; he would only get $500,000.

Technically, Barry Zito would save the Giants money and win them a game.

Do you think you'd ever say that all in one sentence otherwise?

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

You'll Get Caught Up In The...

13 Year Old Steals Dad's Credit Card to Buy Hookers

A 13 year old boy from Texas is convicted of fraud
after using his Father's credit cards to hire escorts.
A 13 year old from Texas who stole his Dad's credit
card and ordered two hookers from an escort agency,
has today been convicted of fraud and given a three
year community order.

Ralph Hardy, a 13 year old from Newark, Texas
confessed to ordering an extra credit card from his
father's existing credit card company, and took his
friends on a $30,000 spending spree, culminating in
playing "Halo" on an Xbox with a couple of hookers in
a Texas motel.

The credit card company involved said it was regular
practice to send extra credit cards out as long as all
security questions are answered.

The escort girls who were released without charge,
told the arresting officers something was up when the
kids said they would rather play Xbox than get down to
business.

Police said they were alerted to the motel by a
concerned delivery clerk, whom after delivering
supplies of Dr Pepper, Fritos and Oreos had been asked
by the kids where they could score some chicks and
were willing to pay. They explained they had just made
a big score at a "World of Warcraft" tournament and
wanted to get some relaxation. On noting the boys age
the delivery clerk informed the authorities.

When police arrived at the motel they found $3,000 in
cash, numerous electronic gadgets, an Xbox video
console with numerous games, and the two local escort
girls.

Ralph had reportedly told police that his father
wouldn't mind, as it was his birthday last week and he
had forgot to get him a present. The father, a lawyer
said he had been too busy, but would take him on a
surprise trip to Disneyland instead.

[Back to top of article]

Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he
thought it was the thing to do when you win a "World
of Warcraft" tournament. They told the suspicious
working girls they were people of restricted growth
working with a traveling circus, and as State law does
not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated
against they had no right to refuse them.

The $1,000 a night girls sensing something up played
"Halo" on the Xbox with the kids, instead of selling
their sexual services.

Ralph's ambition is to one day become a politician.

Celestre on Urbandictionary.com

1. celestre
3 thumbs down


What you call a maid. Then you rape her and make a magical sound. After your done raping your Celestre, wipe her ass because all her poopy poop came flying out. Then feed her oats and prepare her for tomorrow.

Celestre is a whore because she's so great. Richard rapes Celestre a lot.

Peter Magowan Out?

Whispers of A Giant Change
By Ray Ratto

(05-10) 18:52 PDT -- The rumors that Peter Magowan may be looking to end his tenure as managing general big shot of the Giants have been swirling for a few weeks now, but it wasn't until the organization confirmed that the rumors have legs that they started to run.

Neither Magowan nor his manager/cut man Larry Baer has chosen to respond for the record (a possible first in the history of this ownership). Neither was on hand to watch Tim Lincecum dismiss the Phillies 8-2 on Saturday, which is not that unusual. On the other hand, vice president for communications Staci Slaughter, referring to Magowan, told Our Team's John Shea the other day, "He's 66, and has thought about it from time to time, but no decision has been made at all. At this point, he has no decision on that."

In other words, an era in Giants baseball may be coming to an end. We think.

If you don't mind a bit of statement-parsing, 66 has nothing to do with it, he is considering the hell out of retirement, the buyout numbers and other details haven't been agreed to yet and the future for this team is about to become very interesting.

But before we get to the future, let's consider Slaughter's statement, clearly approved by Magowan and Baer, in chronological order:

-- Yes, Magowan is indeed 66, which places him 17th on the Major League Baseball owners' birthday list, 26 years younger than Carl Pohlad (Minnesota), and 18 years older than Stuart Sternberg (Tampa Bay) and Good Time Charlie Monfort (Colorado). Point is, you can be really old and run a ball team.

-- Yes, we're sure he has thought about it from time to time as the era of good feeling has faded and he has become a ready target on so many fronts. Rehashing his legacy isn't all that useful now, so we'll save that for a slower news day. Besides, we don't know if he is thinking of retiring or his partners are thinking of it for him, either, because nobody is talking for the record beyond Slaughter's statement.

All will be revealed in time, along with the amount of money it will cost to buy him out (based on his percentage of shares and the current Forbes franchise valuation of $494 million, we're thinking north of $70 million, although it could be more if the seawall development across from the ballpark gets done).

Anyway, it is less important in the longer view to establish a price tag for his piece or to determine whether he is heading for the pool furniture under his own impetus than it is to figure out what the Giants will look like and operate under in a post-Petey world.

Sue Burns, the widow of Harmon Burns, who owned the largest single share of the team, could take control simply by virtue of holding the most stock. A new investor or investors could surface (the Giants already have 30, so what's a dozen or so more?). A new managing general partner could be named regardless of the size of that partnership. A single big-money operator could try to buy controlling interest. General manager Brian Sabean could take on more responsibility in a new regime. Magowan also simply could step down and hold his shares. The possibilities are as considerable as they are nebulous.

And so are the potential differences. A new owner might be better equipped and philosophically committed to spending more money on the development end. A new owner also might be less of a public a figure (in fact, that's pretty likely, if based only on the recent trend among owners in baseball and other sports). A new owner might leave the baseball department to run the baseball department without obsessing so detrimentally on star power and marketability. After all, good teams market themselves, and make more money than any other type.

On the other hand, a new owner also could be a grand smoking disaster - a profit-taking, publicity-seizing, visionless schmo. Say, like Jeffrey Loria in Florida, just to name one.

But now we're getting ahead of ourselves. Magowan isn't a past-tense owner yet, but he will be, perhaps as soon as season's end. And then the real fun starts, as it always does when an era ends.

Investing in the future of the open Internet

Investing in the future of the open Internet
5/07/2008 03:49:00 AM
Posted By Larry Alder, Product Manager

FROM GOOGLEBLOG.blogspot.com

As you may have read, Google, Comcast, Intel Capital, Time Warner Cable, Bright House Networks and Trilogy Equity Partners have entered into an agreement to invest $3.2 billion in a new wireless broadband company. The new company will combine Clearwire's existing consumer WiMAX business with Sprint's broadband infrastructure and 2.5 GHz spectrum to create a new nationwide wireless broadband network. In addition to our $500 million contribution as part of the investment group, we will provide search and applications to the network's users, and will work with Clearwire to offer additional services and applications. This will include jointly creating an open Internet protocol to work with mobile broadband devices (including Android-powered devices) and implementing other open network practices and policies.

We believe that the new network will provide wireless consumers with real choices for the software applications, content and handsets that they desire. Such freedom will mirror the openness principles underlying the Internet and enable users to get the most out of their wireless broadband experience. As we've supported open standards for spectrum and wireless handsets, we're especially excited that Clearwire intends to build and maintain a network that will embrace important openness features. In particular, the network will: (1) expand advanced high speed wireless Internet access in the U.S., (2) allow consumers to utilize any lawful applications, content and devices without blocking, degrading or impairing Internet traffic and (3) engage in reasonable and competitively-neutral network management.

We're looking forward to seeing the Clearwire network take shape and begin to deliver benefits to users, and we will continue to look for new partners to promote openness and bring compelling applications and services to end users. There's more information on Clearwire and the transaction on Clearwire's site.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Mayo News No Shock, Unfortunate

The news that O.J. Mayo was taking cash and other goods/services while in high school and college should come with no shock to any college sports fan. This goes on way more often than it should and way more than we hear about it. There is too much money involved in the professional sports business now and increased competition among agents that is only going to motivate these types of arrangements more going forward. The added barriers of age-limit restrictions also produces more college athletes (specifically basketball) who are the likely targets of these money games.

With a sport such as football, I completely understand the thought behind age restrictions. League management needs to look out for the health and safety of their rookie athletes in such a physically-demanding sport. I do not agree with an age limit on basketball, a sport that an 18-year-old, if good enough, can play on the same court as 30-year-olds without any increased risk of injury or dilution of game play. Soccer players overseas can be signed as mid-teenagers when team talent scouts believe it is a worthwhile investment. Obviously, even with regulations in place, that scouting is happening in the U.S. with high school players (and sometimes younger) anyways. Controlled markets often can lead to rule and law breaking, especially when incentives are as high as landing a top client is to sports agencies.

That said, I personally do not think there is really an easy answer to solve this problem. Even with no age restrictions, top high school players will be bombarded by prospective agents and other individuals looking out for their own interests rather than the kid's.

Pay the "student-athletes"? Yes, some get free educations and other benefits but I do think in the bigger sports programs this option does make some sense seeing that the athletes are basically employees of multi-million dollar businesses. However, this still is not going to eliminate the wandering eyes and ears of the top athletes and the offers that will be thrown at them.

The NCAA could spend millions every year investigating athletes like Mayo and trying to uncover rule-breakers but that is like asking Bud Selig to investigate steroids users in baseball.

As said before, the incentives are too high (and only increasing) for anyone to expect it to be completely squelched. The sad part is that incredibly talented, young men like Mayo think that $30K is worth all the risk they take on and in turn, bring to their college sports program. In a few months, Mayo will be making millions. He will be able to write $30,000 checks like it's nothing. Unfortunately, without the positive support of protective family and friends, these coddled athletes will continue to make heedless short-term decisions that make little sense over the long-term.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The Soup: Williard Scott

Homeland Security REAL ID Act Begins Today

REAL ID is a law and rule that establishes minimum standards for state-issued driver's licenses and personal identification cards. REAL ID compliant drivers licenses and ID cards will allow you to board a federally-regulated airplane, access a federal facility or a nuclear power plant.

The REAL ID Act of 2005, was passed by Congress to make it more difficult to fraudulently acquire a drivers license or ID card, as part of the effort to fight terrorism and reduce fraud.

REAL ID compliant licenses and ID cards must meet minimum standards which include

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information and security features that must be incorporated into each card
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proof of identity and U.S. citizenship or legal status of an applicant
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verification of the source documents provided by an applicant
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security standards for the offices that issue licenses and identification cards

The 9/11 Commission endorsed the REAL ID requirements, noting that “For terrorists, travel documents are as important as weapons … All but one of the 9/11 hijackers acquired some form of identification document, some by fraud. Acquisition of these forms of identification would have assisted them in boarding commercial flights, renting cars, and other necessary activities.”
REAL ID Next Steps

REAL ID goes into effect May 11, 2008. Recognizing states need more time to implement REAL ID, the department has offered states an extension to allow time to meet the requirements. States granted extensions.

If your state has been granted a REAL ID extension, your current driver's license is still a valid form of identification for boarding a federally-regulated airplane, accessing a federal facility or nuclear power plant.

If your state does not request a REAL ID extension by March 31, 2008, beginning May 11, 2008, you will not be able to use your state-issued driver's license or identification card for an official purpose, such as accessing a federal facility, boarding a federally-regulated commercial aircraft, or entering a nuclear power plant.

You can still present another form of acceptable identification such as a U.S. passport, military ID, or government identification badge.

If you do not have another form of acceptable documentation, you may experience delays at the airport due to the requirement for additional security screening.

Warriors, Baron Far From Making A Deal

OAKLAND — Callers waiting to leave voicemail for Golden State Warriors executive vice president Chris Mullin are serenaded by the Rolling Stones' "You Can't Always Get What You Want."

Never has that been more true for Golden State point guard Baron Davis.

After weeks of informal conversations, Davis' agent, Todd Ramasar, met with Warriors officials Thursday to discuss a potential contract extension for his client. But the talks failed to provide any satisfaction for Davis, a two-time All-Star who just turned 29.

In fact, the sides were so far apart in what they perceive as Davis' worth that Ramasar brought up the specter of Davis using his opt-out clause to void the final year on his current deal and become an unrestricted free agent July 1.

"After sitting down with the Warriors organization (Thursday) regarding Baron's future, I don't know what direction the Warriors are going," Ramasar told the Times. "Baron is adamant about remaining a Warrior, but based on my conversations with the team (Thursday), we have to consider all of his options."

A source close to Davis said it's now a 50-50 chance that the Warriors' captain, coming off a season in which he averaged 21.8 points, 7.6 assists and 4.7 rebounds per game, will not remain beyond next season after various contract offers that were so low as to be practically hurtful.

Davis is slated to make $17.8 million next season, the final installment of a six-year, $84-million contract extension he signed with the New Orleans Hornets.

That deal gave him the maximum allowable salary under the league's collective-bargaining agreement. Davis is willing to give the Warriors a discount and drop down from "max player" status to help Golden State add more talent, but there is a clear difference of opinion in his market value.

Some comparables to Davis in terms of veteran point guards would include Phoenix's Steve Nash (who is playing on a six-year, $63 million deal), Detroit's Chauncey Billups (five years, $60 million), Washington's Gilbert Arenas (six years, $65 million) and Dallas' Jason Kidd (six years, $103 million).

The source said that the Warriors' proposals to Davis were "significantly below" that market value, although it's not clear if the team is going low on its average salary per season or offering higher base pay over a shorter time frame.

That the sides would be at an impasse is not wholly unexpected. Although Davis said after the season finale on April 16 that he wanted to stay with Golden State, he did allow that, "I'm just waiting on the Warriors, to see if they want me here long term or not."

Just hours earlier, Mullin said that he did not plan to engage in contract talks until Davis' opt-out deadline of June 30 had passed, putting the team in a more advantageous position.

Mullin did not return a phone message Friday, and team president Robert Rowell declined to discuss the matter, but the negotiating stance is very much in line with the hard-nosed attitude the Warriors have adopted in recent years with regard to player contracts.

Where previously the team committed more than $100 million over the course of three summers to keep players such as Adonal Foyle, Mike Dunleavy, Troy Murphy and Jason Richardson from hitting the free agent market, Golden State has become much more careful in its spending.

The Warriors and center Andris Biedrins were far apart in failed discussions about an extension last summer, and the team stood pat with lowball, one-year offers that forwards Matt Barnes and Mickael Pietrus eventually accepted.

If continuing that pattern of fiscal responsibility means keeping Davis in limbo for a while, the team appears willing to make that sacrifice.

But it will give Davis time to reflect on whether he wants to be the centerpiece of an organization where not only the athletes but also the executives are asked to play out their deals: Mullin and coach Don Nelson are working on contracts that expire at the end of the 2008-09 season.

Davis referenced the uncertainty caused by such lingering monetary issues after the season finale.

"This is the first time I've played on a team where more than half the team was free agents and playing for their futures," Davis said. "I think we did a good job, but it would be better next year if we had a solid foundation."

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Charles Barkley Is A Dumbass

For Everyone that hates Kobe as much as i do

“Kobe is a Bandwagon Laker”

By Adam Lauridsen
Friday, May 9th, 2008 at 12:46 am in Fun Stuff.

Let me get this out of the way first: I don’t like Kobe Bryant. I am biased. I am a “hater.” I am just a bitter Warriors fan that’s upset because his team didn’t make the playoffs. Blah blah blah. Kobe apologists, hopefully this disclaimer will save you the trouble of writing these things over and over again in the comments below. I stole the title of this post from a comment on Tim Kawakami’s latest Kobe blog entry. To me, the phrase just about captures everything that needs to be said about Kobe’s ascendance to the League’s highest individual honor. Kobe finally has his Most Valuable Player trophy. Whether you’re cheering or jeering likely comes down to what you find valuable in the sport of basketball.

Last summer Kobe Bryant lost it. And by “it,” I mean the last chords of restraint holding back his lack of respect for his teammates and superiors in the Lakers organization. His public trashing of just about everyone involved with the Lakers has been well documented so there’s no need to recap here. The take away, however, was that Bryant felt a sense of entitlement to be surrounded by what he viewed to be the best possible players to help him win that instant, regardless of the havoc it would have wreaked on the future of the organization or the owner’s bank account. Odom, Bynum, draft picks - whatever it took was fine by Bryant so long as Jason Kidd or Jermaine O’Neal was brought to town immediately to help put to rest the 06-07 season’s timid conclusion in the playoff’s first round. Given the great job Kidd and O’Neal did leading their teams to playoff victory this year, Bryant fans should be adding “assistant GM” to the long list of areas in which he excels.

Shockingly, the season started without the Lakers or the rest of the NBA caving to Kobe’s demands. The salary cap was not rewritten to his specifications. He was forced to slum it out on the court with the teammates he had thrown under the bus, then backed over a few times, just months before. On February 3, 2008, the team held a 30-16 record. For those keeping score at home, the 65% win percentage would have been good enough — had they kept up the pace — for a 6th place finish in the West. 6th place would have meant another year of no home court advantage in the playoffs and, just like teams 5-8 in the West this year, likely would have signified another first round exit. Kobe would have had plenty of time to find new people to blame for the failure of the team on which he so badly wanted to be “the man.”

But then, like the insipid, contrived plot twists Hollywood always feels compelled to toss into their movies to produce happy endings, the rest of the NBA — or at least the Memphis Grizzlies — finally jumped to attention, just as Kobe had demanded a few months earlier. In what should go down as the great lopsided trade of a generation — one so bad it has been openly questioned by coaches and team officials around the NBA — Pau Gasol arrived in exchange for a late first round rookie, two picks likely to be even worse, and the tribute to the seductive force of “upside” that is Kwame Brown’s contract. Gasol made his debut on February 5 and the Lakers proceeded to close the season going 27-9.

Given this chronology, I have a few questions:

1. If the lead argument for Kobe’s MVP trophy is the dominance of his team, shouldn’t Gasol (or Memphis GM Chris Wallace) get the trophy? It was Gasol’s addition that raised the Lakers from likely first round fodder to the likely NBA Champions that they are today.

2. If the argument for Kobe’s MVP status rests on his individual performance, why shouldn’t LeBron, putting up better stats, finish ahead of him? Why not Paul, close behind in a few categories but far ahead in others, be viewed as similarly dominant on an individual level?

3. If the reason for Kobe edging LeBron is Kobe’s supposed “intangibles” — his intensity, his clutch play, his toughness — where did all these qualities get him before Gasol arrived? As top dog in LA, Kobe had failed every big test and distinguished himself most in displays of public indignity. His individual performance wasn’t good enough to win him the award in prior years. Why is it good enough now?

I’m not arguing that Kobe isn’t a fantastic player. I’d be blind to deny that he is among the best ever to set foot on a court. Whether he’s deserving of the MVP trophy, however, comes down to what you value in a basketball player. If you want someone who turns the players on a team into a whole greater than its parts, Kobe doesn’t get your vote. If you want someone who was good enough on their own to carry their team to playoff glory, Kobe doesn’t get your vote. If you want someone, however, who considers himself above his teammates and bigger than his franchise, Kobe is your guy. If you want someone who views those around him only in terms of how they can serve his personal goals, check the “Kobe” box on your ballot. MVP is an individual honor, and no one in the NBA personifies the individual above the team or the sport more than Kobe Bryant. In that sense, they couldn’t have given the award to a better guy.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Friday, May 2, 2008

Giants Looking Decent After First Month

The news that Barry Bonds would not return to the Giants in 2008 came as a bit of a shock to some. To others, mainly the players, it has been a breath of fresh air letting them relax and play ball.
"Most defiantly," Barry Zito responded in September 2007 when asked if the Giants would miss Bonds, "Barry's a great competitor, how could you not miss his Hall of Fame production?"
Contrary to "experts" and "mock" everything, the Giants quietly put together a decent month of baseball.
Brian Wilson, the team's closer leads the National League in saves with nine. Jonathan Sanchez and Tim Lincecum are both tied for second in the majors with 40 strikeouts each. While Matt Cain continues to blossom and dazzle with his pitching
The Giants pitching which most thought would be the only bright spot, has been accompanied by other flashes from an offensive lineup not featuring Barry Bonds since 1991.
The Giants lead the majors in steals with 33 and have received contributions from all over the lineup.
Bengie Molina has been solid in RBI situations; John Bowker stepped up from Triple A to produce a powerful left-handed presence, while Aaron Rowand helped plant the seed for a play hard attitude day in and day out.
The best offensive player is the guy who took Bonds' spot in left field, Fred Lewis. In the month of April Lewis led the team with his bat hitting .337 and his glove making play after play after play in the field.
Even if the Giants lose 100 games this season which they won't, there is no denying the first month was entertaining.
"We just go out and play hard every night," Rowand told reporters. With all that fresh air they should have energy to do it every night.